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Some people even begin dating with weeks or a few months.

You can’t please everyone, and what other people – even your kids – think about you isn’t your business anyway. You don’t tell them how to live or who to love and they don’t have the right to tell you anything either.

A couple of cautions: 1) Your family and friends will be at different stages of “ready for you to date” than you are.

Taking their feelings into account is good, but don’t forget that they have their own lives to mind and should leave the minding of yours to you. Try to avoid a revolving door of dates where underage kids are concerned.

Once I did get serious, I expected it to take a lot longer to connect with someone, but the timing was just right.” —Kristin Canning is the health editor at Women's Health, where she assigns, edits and reports stories on emerging health research and technology, women's health conditions, psychology, mental health, wellness entrepreneurs, and the intersection of health and culture for both print and digital.

The question comes up a lot among widowed and those who are interested in dating them – how soon after the death of a spouse is it considered appropriate to begin dating/or pursuing? Other widowed people like to trot out the tired cliché – It’s such a circular and unhelpful answer that I’d like to ban the phrase from the grief lexicon because given the minefield of rules and expectations surrounding widowhood, asking is the only way to clarify whether the signals you are receiving from your peers, family and friends are about your welfare or their self-interest. Scarlett knew the rules on widowed decorum because society at that time spelled it out. It may have sucked, but everyone was clear on the time frame and waited (while perhaps discreetly lining up suitors for once the deadline had passed). Younger widowed date and remarry sooner, and at higher rates, than older ones.




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